The affairs of the mind

I've met a lot of people that have cheated their respective other. In fact I have done that very thing many times and have been on the receiving end almost as much. Each and every time I did it, there was always that immediate ping of regret. At first it would eat away at me for days, consume my every thought and literally pound me into the ground. Now though, it lasts a few minutes.

I don't think it's because I've become used to it. I've become accustomed to the idea that we as humans don't belong with one person.

My grandfather was married to my grandmother for 66 years and after his death, at his funeral, a man in his thirties showed up to pay his respects. No one knew him, but we discovered that he was his son. Ouch!

Marriage is a great thing at first, but it has a way of draining the life out of you. You get to be in a place that is a "complete comfort zone." That means you know each other so well, that it's almost impossible to surprise each other. Where is the spark if there's no spontaneity? Where is the desire if there's no excitement?

You want a fact? The occasional illicit affair is good for a marriage. It will make you more attentive to your significant other. The guilt will drive you into their arms on a different level and you'll be apologizing to your partner on a subconscious level every single day of your life.

But here's the kicker. And this is the only advice I can offer. If you're going to have an affair, then do it through a company that offers discreet relationships with like minded people. I'm not talking about the money making scams like Adult Friend Finder. I'm talking about a legitimate introduction service. Visit escorts, but pay the extra money for the exclusive ones who are picky about their clients and only use protection. OR - have an affair with someone who is married. They have as much as you to lose and will treat the relationship with the same level of discretion as you will.

Married women who have a kid or two and have been in a relationship for a few years crave intimacy. I enjoyed a 7 month affair with a married woman. And she loved being with me because I paid special attention to her. I went down on her constantly, something her husband hardly or never did to her anymore. We would often have sex during lunch breaks in the dark corner of a parking lot. Give a woman the attention and excitement she craves and her life will be fuller for it. So will yours and believe me, so will her husbands.